Small Changes
I just returned from a 5-minute walkabout in the sun, wearing my snowflake pyjama bottoms. As soon as I stepped out my front door, I saw a woman cleaning up dogshit from our front lawn. When she looked up, I said:
“I’m just getting my 5-minutes of sun.”
“It’s supposed to be good for your mental health,” she replied, still scooping.
Everyone seems to know what we SHOULD do, it is just a matter of doing it.
I also took to delaying my daily cup or two of coffee until after some water or peppermint tea, but today I feel like just starting with the hard stuff. It is -10 degrees and while the sun is out, my legs are still thawing.
Other small changes I’ve implemented include shifting from trying full-on 16 hour nightly fasts to more reasonable 12 -14 hour ones. This I can do. 16 hours with morning teaching felt like torture.
While I’m aiming for protein throughout the day, as a “dirty vegetarian” — meaning, not a pure one, I get far less than what’s recommended. I also am trying to include a lot of fibre in my diet, which works against my protein intake. I bought a bunch of nuts yesterday, which I’ll also throw at all of this, but I know there are fat bombs.
My other tweak this week was adding two days of weight-lifting to my gym outings. I went with JP for those (venturing into the top floor co-ed weight area) and did arm-strengthening with the small weights, knowing I’m supposed to lift heavy, but easing into it. I can’t take too much on at once.
Othewise, now that the snow is mostly gone, I’ll resume my river rambles. I have several loop lengths along the Rideau which I walk alone, with JP, or with Jessica. The river is high and fast now and when you stand over it on the footbridge, it almost feels like you are swaying and potentially falling, which leads me to walk the length of it fast and breathe a sigh of relief on the other side.
I’ve also made a clear life-choice, which scared me. I let my principal know that I’m only interested in part-time work next year, which would leave me free time to teach at the senior level, which I now know is where I should be. It may backfire, but it may not, and I just have to see.
If I’ve learned anything from this year off, it is that you have to try new things and see what happens and be open to whatever comes. If choosing to work part-time, particularly at this precarious time, doesn’t work, or feel right later, there can always be another choice. I trust in my ability to make the next right decision. This is a shift.
All of this to say, that we all can make small changes and the results can have a profound effect on our self-esteem and sense of agency. Especially in these uncertain times, it is important to trust ourselves and no be fear-focused. There is much more to each of us than what others can see and we have to believe that. We must strive to become what we need to in order to feel right with the world.
